My Journey to the Seventh Day – To the Eigth

‘…But you, friend of God, CONTINUE in MY PURPOSES for YOUR LIFE. Fret not when the waves are high and the flames hotter: for I AM. I Am LORD over all these and more.” Conversations with ABBA-My Eternal Father

It has not all been painful, some of it has – but its broken me in ways I never expected. Brokenness is not always a bad thing. Earlier today, I came across a harsh tag by brother Chandler Moore the worshiper from Maverick City. It simply pointed to the trauma of saying ‘Yes’ to the call of God in one’s life. Its a Joy-Traumatic. The most delicious recipe – combined with the best of Life’s sweetness and bitterness. If you know, you know.

This was on my mind yesterday, as I sleepily walked from Kenyatta National Hospital’s Morgue, where I had just seen off family and friends who were on their way to lay a close friend, Dishon, to rest in Kano. That walk took me back to what I now consider ‘lighter days’ but were themselves traumatic for the young girl I was then. But these were joyful steps to a sanctuary that had meant (and still does) much to me in those formative years of my faith – that of CITAM Valley Road.

That path, walked many times alone or along with quiet or joyful and noisy company: from prayer meetings; from Sunday services; from work assignments in organizations around there; from get-togethers with dear friends now in Glory; strolled on with one or two beloved ones that evaded the label of ‘forever’ ; restaurants I visited with loved ones and work colleagues; of leaving wedding ceremonies and wondering when/if mine would be next; of being in ambulances, or hearses with those I loved that I never associated with death even when hospital visits could have prepared me for this; for coming from visiting someone gravely sick and discharged never to look back at sickness again – for a season at least. That path, before it was ‘interrupted’ by a fly-over to my destination, held so many precious memories. Lessons. For me at least.

It has not all been bad. I knew deep in me, it was important that I walk that path early yesterday. I still don’t know God’s reason for leading me thus, but that He led, was enough reason for me. I climbed the stairs of the flyover – and I must add here that my knees cooperated quietly – and walked right in the middle of that very high bridge trying to forget gory sights from long ago of accidents right under it, in the days before it was built: and the ‘knowing’ that if I stood at its edges, I may just be pulled over and down…anyway…

I got to the sanctuary at around 8:15am, to find the cleaners dedicatedly preparing it for a Memorial Service scheduled for 9am. Memories of this sanctuary, of the tears of joy and sorrow that I personally have shed within its walls threated to distract me from the purpose of my walk there. My friend Patrick called me just then, to say he was around the area and could give me a ride back to Eastlands where we live. Ahem, separately. I invited him to join me in the sanctuary as I prayed. I had no prayer agenda so I allowed The Holy Spirit to lead. He led me to reaffirm my Love for Him, to rededicate my life back to Him as my True Owner, and just to raise up songs of thanksgiving and adoration. Somehow this ‘little old lady’ kneeling at the front of the sanctuary was still that ‘little searching girl’, still determined to find and follow Love Eternal.

I got up and convinced Patrick to take me for a short visit to my friends’ apartment in Kileleshwa. We loved on God in our conversation as we went. I am glad we did. Kileleshwa too is a key part of my growing up years. Its different now…and I wont go into whether or not I like the changes. The poignant memories there: of many a book closed that I never thought would be. Many others still open, pending future unfinished business, grief, healing, love…God, again. I thought to myself, that many of the reasons that used to bring me here were no longer there to receive me. It was a sad thought. Deeply so.

At around10:30am, Patrick drove me to Embakasi, to my current location for much of the business that God is CURRENTLY working in and through me. I was exhausted on this 7th day of the new year. So I slept soundly throughout that ride. And more so when I got to the house. I was tired. Grateful, sad, encouraged, exhausted from all the remembering. But still had this breath…and the Love in my heart to share…and the Life loaned to me of God to live. To Live for His Smile. Yesterday is gone, but it was a platform that God used for much of today. Possibly for tomorrow. And for this I am grateful.

So back to the call of God on my life – I cannot pretend to understand it all yet. Most times, I am in shock over what He asks for me, on a moment to moment basis, but enthused by the opportunity to catalyze His smile. And that for me is enough. That He smiles at me. Not in the understanding or acceptability of it – to myself mainly – but that He Who KNOWS the full plot, smiles that I have sought to hear Him, heard Him, and then obeyed Him. He is Worthy. He is Enough. Shalom.

#Emmanuel#TheLORDISmyShepherd#ThePilgrimProgresses#GodLovesMelancholicSanguinesToo

“Make a joyful shout to The LORD, all you lands! Serve The LORD with gladness; Come before His Presence with singing. KNOW that The Lord, HE IS GOD; It is He WHO HAS MADE US, AND NOT WE OURSELVES; We are His people and the sheep of His pasture .Enter into His gates with thanksgiving, And into His courts with praise. Be thankful to Him, and bless His name. FOR THE LORD IS GOOD; His mercy is everlasting, And His Truth ENDURES TO ALL GENERATIONS.” Psalm 100 (NKJV)

Feet of a Pilgrim

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